Man in White..

I can't even imagine how many Angels I have met,

yet been in a space where I was too afraid to engage with Life.

As I wander the world, one Pure Being, only wishing to be present with Me.

Asking for nothing but for me to be open to receiving.

Receiving their presence— Receiving the moment. "What if God was One of Us?"

— It is past a point where I can continue to point fingers at what "they" made me feel, how "they" trick me into "missing out" on what is for me. —

To be fully open to connecting to God,

is to be fully open to the possibility that you may connect with the devil.

To be fully open to swim, is to be open to the possibility that you may drown.

I'm more afraid of the ocean these days than I've ever been, I found.

What has been programmed in me that causes me to fear these depths?

One could present to me a golden staircase to Heaven, but only I can take those golden steps..

To the Man in White, please forgive me for my curtness, I know it was not polite. If its any consolation, It's not You, It's my own inner fight. I hope you'd be proud to know I seek to make the wrong right. The only consolation I have for this is knowing that if you are an Angel, you know me by my smile, and not by my bite... not how my human vessel is choosing to show up, but for my inner Light. God, is there something wrong with me? Its been a while since I really felt alright... I deny You, perpetuating my own eternal Night. I seek comfort in Your sightless refuge, yet when You come near I turn away.. It is only when You are gone that I find I have so much to say.. If You can hear me now, I hope you'd be willing to once more pass my way.. I'd create a better path to cross, or at least get a better look at your face....